FIRE ESCAPE First Draft Update for 5/29/18: Suddenly–an ESCAPE!

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When we got outside there was literally a car waiting for us. It was a red two-seater  and it was very sexy. The only problem was—there was someone behind the wheel.

“GET IN, ALREADY!” She barked with a voice that was gravelly but somehow piercing at the same time. We ran around to the other side of the car and, as KJ opened the door for me, I stopped and looked at the woman behind the wheel. It was an old lady—complete with curly white hair and a house dress—she reminded me a lot of a high school friend of mine’s grandma.

“Get in! Get in!” She said.

“Where? There’s only one seat open!”

KJ shoved me into that one seat and then squeezed in beside me. Immediately I felt crammed into the seat as KJ swung the door shut behind him. The uncomfortableness increased when the old lady slammed on the pedal.

“Aw come on, man!” I said without thinking.

“Whatsa matter? I thought you two were close friends.”

“Uh, ‘good friends’ yes, ‘physically close’ friends… I just like my personal space.”

“Well, sorry kid—my selection of Earth cars was limited when I picked this up.”

“Why are we in such a hurry? The Conva totally let us go!” I said, adding: “How is this car even running in an atmosphere without oxygen?”

“It’s electric,” the old lady said.

“The who?” KJ asked.

“The Conva—what the Double-Oes call themselves,” I said.

“Because of the Double-O faction that seems to be trying to foil the plans of your pals back there,” the old lady said.

“What are you talking about?” I asked.  The old lady continued: “Your sister did some more research while you were away and found that the Double-Oes don’t all agree on how to go about interacting with the sovereign beings who live in the Prime Trimension.”

“Ah, is that what we’re calling our set of dimensions now?”

“Nah, that’s what Department M calls it. Typical white-guy-savior syndrome, man,” KJ said.

“So, where do we go from here?  As in, what is the plan?” I asked. “We gonna head out to the Fire Escape that I used to get here?”

“Sorta,” the old lady said.

“What do you mean by sorta?”

“Look!” she said nodding at something through the windshield of the car.  I tried to spot what she was nodding toward, but all I saw was the literal end of the figurative road.  The ground we were racing across abruptly ended a couple hundred feet from where we were. 

“Uh-oh,” the old lady said in a disturbingly flat tone just as she slammed on the gas again.  

“Why are you slamming on the gas again?” I glanced over at her as she nodded through the back windshield.  I craned my neck and managed to see what she was referring to–it was two Conva ships, similar to the one I’d managed to hijack temporarily.  Aaaand they were closing fast.

“Uh, if we’re heading to the Fire Escape I used to get here, why are we heading toward that cliff?”

“Because we’re heading to the Fire Escape you used to get here, man!” the old lady said sounding like she thought I was an idiot.

“KJ, who is this lady?”

“There was a major battle fought on this asteroid while you were off with those other aliens, the Galak-ga.  A massive bomb went off around the Fire Escape.”


“Don’t worry, kid, it’s still there,” she said.  “In fact, we’re getting close.  Grab the Accessory in the back and turn on that AR whatsis thing so we can see the thing we’re aiming for and do it fast cuz we’re running out of landscape.”

I craned my head around again and saw the Accessory in the small amount of space behind the two front seats.  With a bit of effort I managed to get it, and pull it into the front seat with us.  I immediately activated it and pulled up the AR holo-map.  Just as the old lady pressed some button on the dashboard that made us accelerate so fast it felt like we were lifting off of the ground–and then we did.  I heard an explosion behind me as the old lady barked at me.

“Where is it?!?”

“It’s that one!” I said making sure to select it in the interface so there was an AR cube around it.  Then, she pulled back on the steering wheel and turned it to the left.  I could see her also stepping on a pedal that I thought was the gas pedal, but it turns out this car could also fly.

“Alright, kid, you do what you have to do to get us back to the Prime Trimension–preferably not to Nowhere House because this car will not fit!”

“Are you kidding me?!?!”